falling
I am still a cranky girl with my smiles and loud voice, as well as my laughters.
Just that I may have lost myself..
Just that I may have lost myself..
bubbly
Tuesday, November 4, 2008 1:51 PM
Break before stats tutorial now, really getting bored and I'm here to update my blog..BEWARE! RANTINGS AHEAD! It's the emo me now...bleahx...Someone asked me to forget the terrible experience I encountered recently. But it simply reminds me of it? No matter how determined I am to forget him, sometimes, at familiar places, his image just pops up like a pop-up ad in my brain, flashes of memory...I thought I was strong when I didn't cry when the expected outcome came, but apparently not, I was just stuck in his betrayal. Up till now, I can't help but to remember him at times, forget him completely? I doubt so...Emotional people are like me I suppose...Just that I don't really show it that obviously when things crops up, really hard to suppress feelings, especially bad ones...This guy friend of mine has given me support though, persuading me real hard to forget that ass...I wish I could, but the memories and experience seems stuck there...Pathetic me...And whenever I read sweet, romantic novels, like the one I'm reading now [Twilight], it just reminds me of how bad my experience was with such an ass like him...Saddened! No matter how much effort I put in, it's still there, how can I make myself forget him then? I wonder...I'm not so positive about this, since my best friends have been trying to get me out of the deep hole I've fallen into, yet, I'm still stuck..Maybe I have risen 3 levels up that hole, time and studies did the job by distracting me from that. I was fortunate that school started soon enough for me to indulge in laughter with the double d's...And I was kept occupied with new stuff in school, dance was a regular affair and it made me happy to be able to dance Jive although it's the most tiring dance of all. Besides, there's Jing Mei and Celine being really supportive of me all these while. Maybe I should try as much as possible to stop sinking back into the hole. BUCK UP and focus on my studies or something else. I wonder why but I've been really restless during class nowadays. Seems to be reliving the past yet again, follow the foot prints I left behind, which isn't a good thing in my opinion, because that old foot prints happen to be my unglam past which I've been hiding as much as possible, it would probably scare people off and they dun wanna be my friends anymore...I SHALL STAY STRONG! HAPPY W/O WORRIES!
Focus on reading the new book I'm addicted to...That might help, indulge in the imaginary world the book gives me...Fall into a deep sleep and dream of wonderful stuff, only not to be waken again....
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